i miss u~

I miss u~

A moment like this is our story...

R u missing me?

A litle bit wrong a litle bit rite....

And i'll cherish all the love that we shared...

i've been searching for this feeling for years...n u r the 1 dat gave me that....

All i wana say is

"some people wait a lifetime for a moment like this,i can't believe it's happening to me"

And allowed me to say a "Thank You" the moment is alwiz in my heart....

原来曾经拥有过 还比失去痛苦。。 。

最近的心情好复杂。。 。

我，怎么了？？ 听着陈伟联的 i love u ， 突然好想念这里。。 。这几晚，我洗澡洗得特别久。。 以前的回忆，好像波涛汹涌的海水一样，向着我直冲来。。 。 我，快透不过气了。。 。

我不否认，现在的我，的确很幸福。他，比以前更爱我了。。。

那，我还在犹豫些什么呢？？ 多余吧？不过。。。 就是有一些更轻易的幸福吧？不必这样粉身碎骨。。。

我累了。。。想洗个澡。。。别了。。。

A whole new world

Yesterday while im working,i found out the Aladdin's song,by nick pitera...his voice is wonderful..i wan 2 upload his song here...must be amazing while writing my blog with the background song is a whole new world...feel like im flying over to the disneyland and became the princess dancing with my prince....ohh! my prince charming...lolx....start dreaming again...

When i can stop dreaming and go back to my studies huh?! I dono....a real soon i guess...bcause i reli run out of time d...i can no more having fun, evynite hang out with frenz...ohh!! i hate exam!! i wish i can evyday having fun like this...nowaday im staying with bebe....seem like im used to have ah be in my life alrdy...im insomnia on my own bed...i cannot sleep alone now...i need to smell ah be before i fall asleep evynite...i still rmb that nite wen v went out 2gtr and wen we reached home you told me that this is like our own house...how gud if we have our own 1...i wish too be....i can feel ur love so muz nowaday....u make me feel like im dropping down into a honey pool...tq ah be~ for loving me..

We start to go bec to our normal life...we din meet up wif jolyn n su dem 2nite...u promised me to stay up at home and company me to fight for my exam...i hope that this time ah be can reli do it...hehe...i find that im too lazy d....laziness lead to alotz of bad things...i became very very lazy...totaly don feel like wan to touch my books...i rather on9 or hide inside my blanket also don wan to get up and study...

No more Laziness!! start to do revision now!!!

But now it's time to sleep d...ah be still playing game...gotta drag him to bed d....nitez nitez

The Ugly Truth

Truth is alwiz ugly huh?

I find that nowaday im growing from a small gal to become a matured thinking gal...i mean at least mature then laz time...i used to be a small gal who alwiz dreaming in wonderland...i dream about love...i dream about the perfect love...i dream about the kind of relationship alwiz ful with sweetness,loves,and care....

But...

The world is alwiz cruel...that is only happen in wonderland...never happen in this reality world...maybe yes but the percentage is almost zero...

I were asking myself a question during i took my bath tonight....i asked myself if i evyday eat the same dish for more than 1 yr...i mean jz 1 DISH...1 TYPE....SAME DISH evyday...will i gt bored....my ans is yes...but my principle is dish is dish....some DISH u jz cant simply change or have more than ONE DISH at the same time,that is because of if u eat them 2 gtr the consequences that will occur is just terrible n unimaginable...so,in a relationship it's also the same...human is living creature..when we in a relationship we are in a relationship with a human...we can communite to each other....we have minds...we have our own thoughts....that's y we need to share...sharing is caring...we care that's y we share....we share because of we care..

I disagree with what u have told me just now...im not agree u say that mayb because of i have lesser relationship experience so wat i have done to u is alwiz failed....i disagree because if u want me to compared with u those short and incalculable relationship i think they cannot be compared...they are two different thing...

I get to know an ugly truth 2nite...it's hurt....it make me bleeding inside....but i promised myself to keep it as a secret 4eva....i noe wat to do next...because rite now i reli reli tired n exhausted d...i need to take a break...a short break in my heart...i wont tel anyone how hurt it's ...i will hide evythng up until i recover myself...until im able to stand up again n stand rite bside u...not underneath of ur feet..

I can feel ur love sometimes...I know u love me...i do...but sometime im lost....lost in somewhere and cant feel ur love at all...diz is unstable...that's y i scare...

What shud i do?can i? noo....you cant silly gal...just let evythng be normal....if it's urs then is urs....so think more also useless....now 4.30 in the morning d.....time to sleep d...less than 4 hour from now i need to get ready go college d....

hmm....gud nitez beth...n bebe...

Zzzzzzz............Zzzzzzzzzzz.....................ZzzzzzzzzZzzzzZzzz

10 more days to go~ =(

ah bebe...10 more days to go ler...hmm...how ne hoe ne...without u i cant sleep ler...aiz...u must alwiz come bec and visit me okies?promise de ha...da gou gou gai shou yin~chop! chop le o...muz come bec ya...aiz....still sad sad...2nnite ah be say wan go kai kai...dono wan go whr...keke...hapy~long time we din go kai kai d...hmm...miss u muz muz be~mui mui mui~

Im down ='(

This morning once i woke up i received ah be msg...he told me that he's goin 2 butterworth workng very soon...2nite only discuss this with me...my heart like thousand tonnes of rocks...im sank back to bed and very very sad....ah be if go there working mean we cant alwiz meet d...he will be staying there d...im sad....i cant live alone rite now...i jz cant..i noe that in this world no 1 cnt live without others...but right now i just cant...it's because of we just get bec 2 gtr not long ago...now not yet reli stable down....so it's just not the rite time to have any distances between us...

Last nite only ah be asked me whether i have write down how i felt anot about recently we almost stay 2gtr le...i like stay at his house d...evyday i go working and college...he go working...den at nite i stay at his house...we sleep 2gtr....very sweet...he said our relationship like uplevel d..but sudenly 2day he got meeting and need to go prai working very soon...im sad...im down...how?i dono what to do..

After woke up i watched movie with his mum...very nice the movie...quite funny...we both quite enjoy the movie...after that i start to feel dizzy..especialy when i sit on his bed i feel like the bed can turn around....and i feel like im goin to faint....dono why suddenly like this...

I whole day very down..i dowan bebe to go other place working...even he need to go i also hope that he can come bec evyday....donit 2 stay there....hmm.. ='(

Last nite we went to Shrlyn farewell....2nite just not a smooth nite 4 evybody....Jeff being punched by mickey again....thing are getting more complicated now as Jolyn n Ivan also said to be involved in this matter...hmm....after reached home me n ah be took few foto 2 gtr....then we cooked maggi mee...ah be cook nishiin noodle....ah be noe i love sausages...so he purposely put more 4 me...love u be...muackz...

23.09.2009

23rd of Sept...it just a normal 23rd...make no diff....nothing special...2day is jz we 2gtr 1 yr and half d...but i din expect anythng on 2day...bcz i noe that the more i expect the more disappointment i will get...so im cool with it now..i noe u 4gt d...but it's ok.....i jz realize that when we expect too much our life will bcm vy boring...cz there will be no surprises at all....hmm....i will just sit there n wait...wait n wait....see whether 23rd will be a memorable day for me anot....bcz so far until now u are the one that i stay with for 1 yr n half...the longest period i guess...u break my record!

*************************

Our hamster died on this day...

Im so sad...dono how 2 described the feeling..when i reach ah be house it was alrdy weak in breathing...and eyes cant open alrdy...my tears start to fall....i cant talk...i cant do anythng...im helpless.....reli helpless....this is my 1st time feeling so helpless...when i went thru the process where a life being taken by god...i cant do anythng to stop it...i dowan him to go....it's still too small to go to the heaven....i miss him...i reli do....what i can do is keep calling him to wake up...dun stop breathing...my tears keep flowing...even now when i writing this blog my tears are running inside my eyes....i noe that im not a good mother yet...and i dono wat's inside ah be's mind...im lost...im all alone...im down...im sad....i asked bebe izit our hamster died on 2day mean that our love goin 2 end soon?I ask why must be 2day?He said it's just the coincidence...im so tired...i think thousand of vanilla sundae also wont make me feel happier ler 2day...2day just not a gud day...

Hope my lovely hamster R.I.P..