会呼吸的痛 ='(

Day 2

这是第二天。。。一睁开双眼的那一杀那，我就好想念你。。。好强好强。。不过，紧接下来的是，心里好酸哦。。。因为知道，再也不能想念你的时候就对你说。。。因为我害怕吵到你。。。你说你需要一些时间。。。要好好想一想我们的未来。。。我好害怕。。。害怕一切就会因此而失去了。。。我好害怕失去你宝贝。。。我真的好后悔。。。和一班朋友去了唱歌。。。我的笑容也假了。。我这两天也有专心读书，也有和朋友出去，不过即使是有了家人，朋友，学业，事业，我还是觉得少了宝贝，我的生活还是不完整了。。。我明白了许多，知道生活是要有以上的几点才完整。。。我知错了，我忽略了宝贝的自由和空间。。。所以宝贝变得不开心了。。。我现在懂了，想要让宝贝拥有全部，同时拥有我们的爱。。。我以前不懂得未必明天就有以后，宝贝现在我好想念你。。。真的连呼吸都会痛。。。它活在我身上的每一个角落。。。哼你爱的歌会痛，看你的信会痛，连沉默也痛。。。遗憾是会呼吸的痛。。。后悔不贴心会痛，恨不懂你会痛。。。想见不能见最痛。。。我的微笑都假了，灵魂像漂浮着。。。你在就好了。。。我发誓不让你累了，会用细腻的心去爱你，去陪伴你度过这段过渡期。。。就像当初我放不下时你也一样用爱耐心陪我渡过。。。宝贝，你快点回来好吗？我好想念你。。。迷失了路的小女生还是会在草原上等待男孩牵她的手一起回家的。。。即使天黑了，她也不会走的，因为小女孩知道男孩始终会找到她的。。。因为也只有他才会找到她。。。。

The 1st blog in 2011...

It's Dec 2011 now...it's coming to the end of the year now...i just realize that this one whole year i didn't even update 1 post here....this year is the most difficult year for me as what i would say...1st is i lost the relationship which i maintained for more than 3yrs...This is the most difficult decision that i ever made....my glassy heart had broke into thousand of pieces...my tears...even when im updating this post keep flowing...im listening to fish leong-可惜不是你 my tears like waterfall keep flowing...we both knew it...we miss each other...but just like rihanna song- we found love....in a hopeless place.... 可惜不是你 陪我到最後 曾一起走卻走失那路口。。。tonight im very emo...evytime seeing u i will emo like now..really like pinky elmo...='( i know u very well honestly... u are gud...just gt 1 thing nt gud...u shud noe wat i refer to right if u seeing this post...i dono whether u still remember or not...you have promised me one day even we are no longer together u will stop the bad habit as you have promised before...i miss the habit to pat each other's pet pet 3times b4 slp....='(.... now evything has gone...and i tried very hard to adapt myself in this new life....sometimes i will miss those good old days...but i have no choice...i need to move forward... all these sweet memories will be embedded in my heart forever...YOU as well...good nitez....

心情故事 #1

十月五日 晴

心情错综复杂 . . . 百般交际 . . . 我紧张是因为那些画面重复性的在侵犯我 . . . 我焦虑是因为我担心,我害怕!! 我内疚. . .是因为我知道我是不会被原谅的!犯了不该犯的错~ 陈淑桦的梦醒时分一直一直不断的在我脑海里盘旋. . . 这才是我漫长假期的第三天而已 . . . 我已像烂泥一样. . . 尽管知道这次考试有多重要,但我还是一样!! 我是个颓废的人!! 我不要再继续当垃圾了! 好! 从今天晚上开始 . . . 一杯咖啡一本笔记. . .一步一步往成功迈进!

好咯,现在是时候停止那些没没 (bo bo) 的想法,一起努力去! 明天我会再来这里交功课哦!看看我到底及格吗 . . . 是否有完成任务!! 加油哦! =)

Bangkok Trip 2009

18.12.09
The day we get ourself to Bangkok City...a shopping heaven for every galz....after we reach there benni's uncle picked us up from airport...den we have our 1st meal there...we ate thai style fried rice and the 1st 7-11 sausages...1st time eat the sausage feel like not so nice...but the next food we took is vy nice...the soup vy nice...we have two bowls...keke...after that we went to sukhotai hotel...that hotel 1nite RM1k oh...expensive but real nice...after v checked in 2our hotel we went to cha-chu-chat...a place whr i bought many thing...keke....shop til 4am den headed bec to hotel n sleep...Zzzz...

19.12.09
We went to a shopping mall but i 4gt the name de...that's the place nearby the 4 faces buddha...after we prayed we went to platinum...a place that i spend the most...reli like a sampah collector...most of the thing that i hv bought is not wat i need...but im so hapy...keke...after tired of shopping,our next location is headed to the massage centre...this is a place whr we gt cheated by the taxi driver...so unbelievable that benni's uncle alrdy talked to him but he stil dare to cheat us...wen v reach the tradisional massage..omg!!!so damn syok...the auntie's skill so gud..so relaxing and refresh after the massage...den we go bec to our hotel and gt ready to go for the tiger show...wen we on the way gt there we saw a death accident...omg...our heartbeats suddenly bcm vy fast....wen we reached thr the person say 2nite gt police checking...so cnt let us go in....so disappointed....den we went bec hotel n slp again...Zzzzz

20.12.09
Last day 4 shopping....we went to Paragon...we wish to get some clothes fr Zara but we came out fr the shop with empty hands....so disappointed...den i jz gt 2 singlet fr mng...taht's all i gt fr thr...den we decided to go bec to platinum b4 we have the pork burger at mcd...and those brocolli n corn pies...yuck....i still prefer banana pies...we fully utilise the 1 hr we left in platinum...cz this is the last time we shopping at here le b4 we go bec to malaysia...me n lao yee shop like crazy...we both gt something we want...but we still vy sad that we don hv enough time to look for other things...i hv no time to look for my handbag and high heeled shoes...after that we went bec to hotel with tut tut...keke...den after some touch-up benni uncle fetched us for dinner....we have our dinner at riverside bangkok....we have our meal on the ship n the whole journey tk about 2 hrs..the seafood is nice and the view i dono how 2 decribe by words..it's so awesome n i wnt 4gt about it...the sweet moment we had on the ship is alrdy save inside our memory...but too bad ah be is not wif me..if not we will hugging each other n kissing till we are breathless......i wish 1day my mr.right will propose to me on such ramantic place...lolx...bcz the view are so amazing....the dinner end our story in bangkok so perfectly....evythng is written on the plate that we hv bought....3of us bought it 2 rmb the nite,the view and the sweet moment on the ship...

21.12.09
Day we say goodbye to bangkok and bec to msia...we have some burger in burger king and then we walked around b4 boarding...i bought some leather purse 4my family....im like the name card holder so muz...we shopped till 4gt the time and the gate alrdy closed...luckily they open the gates 4us and we run like crazy...keke....luckily they wait 4us...hehe...if nt we will missed the flight d...

* * * * * * * * * * * * *

After reached pg evythng bec to normal....and i start to miss the sausages n ding ding mian that we ate evynite in 7-11....here don hv...sad sad....gud nitez n all the memories is inside d....i will alwiz rmb....nitez

i miss u~

I miss u~

A moment like this is our story...

R u missing me?

A litle bit wrong a litle bit rite....

And i'll cherish all the love that we shared...

i've been searching for this feeling for years...n u r the 1 dat gave me that....

All i wana say is

"some people wait a lifetime for a moment like this,i can't believe it's happening to me"

And allowed me to say a "Thank You" the moment is alwiz in my heart....

原来曾经拥有过 还比失去痛苦。。 。

最近的心情好复杂。。 。

我，怎么了？？ 听着陈伟联的 i love u ， 突然好想念这里。。 。这几晚，我洗澡洗得特别久。。 以前的回忆，好像波涛汹涌的海水一样，向着我直冲来。。 。 我，快透不过气了。。 。

我不否认，现在的我，的确很幸福。他，比以前更爱我了。。。

那，我还在犹豫些什么呢？？ 多余吧？不过。。。 就是有一些更轻易的幸福吧？不必这样粉身碎骨。。。

我累了。。。想洗个澡。。。别了。。。

A whole new world

Yesterday while im working,i found out the Aladdin's song,by nick pitera...his voice is wonderful..i wan 2 upload his song here...must be amazing while writing my blog with the background song is a whole new world...feel like im flying over to the disneyland and became the princess dancing with my prince....ohh! my prince charming...lolx....start dreaming again...

When i can stop dreaming and go back to my studies huh?! I dono....a real soon i guess...bcause i reli run out of time d...i can no more having fun, evynite hang out with frenz...ohh!! i hate exam!! i wish i can evyday having fun like this...nowaday im staying with bebe....seem like im used to have ah be in my life alrdy...im insomnia on my own bed...i cannot sleep alone now...i need to smell ah be before i fall asleep evynite...i still rmb that nite wen v went out 2gtr and wen we reached home you told me that this is like our own house...how gud if we have our own 1...i wish too be....i can feel ur love so muz nowaday....u make me feel like im dropping down into a honey pool...tq ah be~ for loving me..

We start to go bec to our normal life...we din meet up wif jolyn n su dem 2nite...u promised me to stay up at home and company me to fight for my exam...i hope that this time ah be can reli do it...hehe...i find that im too lazy d....laziness lead to alotz of bad things...i became very very lazy...totaly don feel like wan to touch my books...i rather on9 or hide inside my blanket also don wan to get up and study...

No more Laziness!! start to do revision now!!!

But now it's time to sleep d...ah be still playing game...gotta drag him to bed d....nitez nitez